Damn Kids

This past week, I found out how old I was.  This is not only a warning to all of those re-entering the "real world," but also to those who have not realized this predicament occurs so quickly in one's life.  Let me first begin by stating that I am a twenty-something year old male about to enter the professional world.  While this may not be important to you, the fact of the matter is, I still feel like I have a strong grasp on the popular culture references of our time and generation.  This past week, however, led me through so many loops and trials of this belief, and I now feel as if this strong grasp is a dangling pinky finger hanging onto the edge of the seal while my other hand struggles to reach for the holy grail.

Although some may know this, I am fortunate enough to be allowed to stand in front of a room of ninety fourteen and fifteen year olds each day and mold their minds so they don't become fucked up rejects like me.  If that doesn't make any sense, than you're like me.  After being in this position for some time, the only way I see the education system changing is by hiring the aliens from Independence Day to destroy the entire US.  With Windows 95 obsolete, there is no way Jeff Goldblum can stop the nation's imminent doom.  While I'm making this reference, let me just say that this movie brought about the Bush administration.  People are dumb enough to believe that their President can make decisions, be witty, and kick ass as a fighter pilot.  "Eagle One, Fox Two!"

Sorry to digress, but the point I'm going to make is simple.  People of my age are now too old to make references to pop culture that relate to fourteen and fifteen year olds.  Here are some things that I have found out over the past couple weeks, leading me to believe that I am older than I think:

1. Kids know Limp Bizkit, but not Led Zeppelin.

2. Kids write in text format.

3. Kids think The Cleveland Show is funnier than South Park...and The Simpsons.

4. Kids don't know who Bill

 Cosby, Chris Farley, or Christopher Wallace is.

5. Kids think that the prequels are better than the original trilogy.

While these kids are certainly idiotic, fuck-brained twats, they did make me realize how generations just don't mesh.  My parents think my taste in music, movies, and television is simply fucked up, and I'm not even going to say what my grandparents thought.  But now I understand that not only do old people die, but so does pop culture.  While only certain people continue to bare the useless mantle of pop culture knowledge for their generation, the rest go on to live their lives, not realizing that they are demolishing a bridge between two generations.

I just don't want to die like that crazy fuck in Big Fish.